Spin-drying instructions for a Haier semi-automatic (they still exist!) washing machine:
Please arrange the laundries evenly.
If spinning the uneven laundries it will arise vibration and the spin result is not good. Please stop spinning and arrange the laundriers (sic) evenly.
Don't touch the bin in the spinning tub before the tub pause, specially care about the children.
I must have read these lines quite a few times, and I keep finding something new to smile at. Priceless.